As it is available.

I.
She reads Vonnegut after running out of cigarettes. She must not have known me to be a writer. What a title! I'm sure she must know that I would never claim such a title, & especially never say such to her.
She may speak of Ulysses or Grendel, of which only a small portion I know. She knows this. I've seen her looking, thinking, analyzing. I so hope she does not take this night as evidence, but she must. Where do I go from here?
I would love to learn to communicate & to say it all without tongue. I want her to hear song instead of voice, yet I cannot seem to change my patterns of explanation. I should be quieter in total; explaining more with my eyes than my tongue. I begin to shift my character & long for a reaction, but I'm sure she sees right through it.
It's daybreak around here, & she sits writing on unbound paper--like a note for her pocket to remind her of something important. I wish it was me, but my pride is learning, or I am learning It.
It is all unnerving, but beauty should be. What did she say beauty is? Probably not this island. I will gather the nerve & ask it again. I cannot let this go by...

II.
One day (I'll show you)
I'll write beautifully
& apologise with my eyes to refrain
from blocking your insights.
I wish I could hear them, but insofar
my perceptions have been happiest
beside yours.
I let it all run shapes
and excite for
what comes of tomorrow.

()

I travel into reflections the same way they half-express themselves in my pupils & different again with one eye closed. I kiss the light with music until I develop new frequencies and She shows me what it all looks like.
The written word walks off the page and into distant canyons inside the coffee table while flying saucers float above, casting perfect-circle shadows on the landscape.
With a serious face I ask the coffee pot's Ghost why it looks so grim.

A million things to talk about.

...but chances are I won't get through it all, so let's start with a run down of basics.

1. Went to Thailand from Japan.

2. Traveled around Thai areas such as Kho Tao, Tonsai, Bangkok, Chiang Mai, etc.

3. Enjoyed the company of Canadian friends and new friends from Brittania.

4. Participated in the 3rd annual Pirate Party.

5. Traveled to Laos:
-Went tubing (or chewbing, as the English say it)
-Rented a scooter most days and rode around, occasionally spelunking.
-Enjoyed not getting malaria.

6. Said some sad goodbyes.

7. Arrived in Chiang Mai from Laos only to find that the rest of my money had been stolen and replaced with Indonesian bills worth a little bit less than a dollar.

8. Got a bit of money from people who love me.

9. Finally went to a cinema again for the first time in well over a year; saw "Wanted" and then later, "The Dark Knight". Good ways to get back into cinemas.

10. Began a certified Lek Chaiya massage course (4 more days to go).

11. Upon course completion, will probably head South and then East.

12. Getting my ass in gear for living & working in Taiwan/China.

13. Waiting for the storm to pass so that I can run back to my guesthouse, hopefully after purchasing some delicious market food(s).

*This list may be referenced in whole or part when I finally write a substantial story.

Ideas to change my blog. I like this blog, but it might be time for some fresher archives. Thoughts?

Also, I promise that I will finally begin my Music and Film blogs when I finally get settled and have my computer. Ideas for those blogs are also appreciated.

pt.I


Wind-blown waves
waving white caps
to crest in our direction,

amidst palm trees covering
stray dogs & children.

鹿児島、さよなら。[Kagoshima, sayonara.]

I assume that this shall most likely be my last blog in Kagoshima for quite some time.
I will catch a bus up to Fukuoka with Saeko and catch my plane to Thailand with a brief layover in Taiwan.

I have been filling my time as of late with many goodbyes, new and old music, building up my party tolerance (for thailand), and wondering if I'll have everything packed up in time for my bus on Sunday.
I have a feeling I won't be sleeping much for these next two days which will at least give me something to do on the plane.
I had really forgotten how hard it is to say goodbye.
Not the word, the situation. Like witnessing a tragedy you are choosing to be a part of. Thankfully most of my friends understand that it's almost impossible to say the right things when one leaves. Thank God language is not restricted to the tongue. The tricky part is finding the people who remember this. A friend you can sit in silence with is the hardest one to say goodbye to, but you can say it in the easiest way.
Perhaps it won't get any easier, but I'm so relieved that only Saeko will be there to see me leave.

Communication is better left unspoken.

Hang Drum.

I believe I have found the instrument I have always been meant to play.
Obtaining a Hang Drum has now become one of my highest priorities.

Something wonderful.

One of the greatest, most innovative things I have seen.
blublu
The rest of the site is also brilliant.

哲学。[philosophy]

屋上で。
AM３時に。

時廻詩：　”人生は何が欲しいですか。”
水の：　　”エー？何言ったの？”
時廻詩：　”何が欲しい？人生は。”
水の：　　”．．．マー、ビツに。まだわからない。”
時廻詩：　”アー、それはいいね。”
水の：　　”いい？なぜ？”
時廻詩：　”人生はビツにでしょう。”
水の：　　”まだわからない．．．”
時廻詩：　”だから、いいよ。”

音楽と映画です。

Eleven months into this country, I am finally finding all of the wonderful art forms that I have been longing since day one.

Japan has so many beautiful things to offer.

Some day soon I will make a list of recommendations.

踊るため。

彼女は僕が天使のように見えたと言った。
僕は太陽を見、微笑した。

Sometimes It's Better Not To Speak.

If you were to discover something absolutely incredible, yet something that, upon mentioning, would encourage most of your peers to think you were absolutely insane, would you rationalize it away?

The Vacation Comes To An End.

My body is wrecked, and I have more things to express than I know what to do with.
I wish one could shower their mind; just lather it all up at the end of a long day's consciousness.

Clovers.

My friend Rieko constantly points out how "lucky" I am, as she puts it.
The other day we were sitting in my friend Yohei's house when she said,
"I really can't believe how lucky you are. You're too lucky. One of these days your luck will backfire on you, and when it does it'll be really bad because of how lucky you've been up to now. Maybe it will happen in China."
"That's a dangerous place for it to happen.", I replied.
"Yeah, you'll probably die. But I'm really excited for it to happen, because it will make things seem normal again. Make sure you tell me about it when it happens."
"You mean when I die?"
"Yeah, well, I'm Japanese, right? We all believe in ghosts. [menacing laugh]"

Three seconds later, my drink was finished.

Sometimes you just meet the right...people?

Kanoya Goodbyes.

Last night was my first "farewell party".
I know, I know, I'm not actually leaving quite yet, but this will be the last week of teaching in Kanoya City, which is my monthly business trip.
Drinking games and happy-sad feelings were in order.
It astonishes me to think of the people whom I've met in this country, and especially this town.
It was wonderful to have all of my Kanoya friends in the same room, and endlessly interesting to think that when we first became friends the only Japanese I was sure of was, well, almost none.
My friend Chiaki is a professional calligraphy artist and teacher. She wrote out about 10 stunningly beautiful Kanji for me in varying styles as a farewell gift.
She framed one of them, which is too old to be recognized on this computer, which is a single, double-unit Kanji conveying understanding by non-communication.
My friend Yohei explains it as, "heart to heart".

Sometimes you just meet the right people.

Point of Interest (suspiciously similar to Angie's method):

Yohei and I spent about 20 drunken minutes in a heated debate over which Anime is the best: Cowboy Bebop or one of the Gundam series.
And then...

Yohei: "There are so many variations on the Gundam series!"
Me: "But quantity doesn't determine quality!"
Yohei: "Well, how many episodes does Cowboy Bebop have?"
Me: "Around 26 or so. Did you forget?"
Yohei: "No, I've never seen Cowboy Bebop."
Me: "Wha-...Then...what's your point of reference?"
Yohei: "I like Gundam a lot."

I'll be heading to his house tonight to do some music and word collaborations.

Short Versions of Long Nights.

Last night I went out with friends for one of the last times in Kanoya City (tomorrow night is my first Farewell Party).
At one point I was asked if there was "taroh" in Canada.
I gave a confusing look, sat for about 30 seconds in silence, and finally realized that what sounded like "taroh" was actually the "Japanized" word for "terrorists".
I said that there weren't.
Shortly after, a girl I had just met that night told me that she was thinking she had fallen in love with me, adding, "but only a little bit".
I told her that I've found Love hard to measure.

名前が無し。[no name]

I believe that I am beginning to see realities how the ancients have seen them.
I am seeing multiple Space-Time possibilities in harmony. I am interacting with people's dreams. I am feeling sound, seeing taste, and smelling touch.

Today I received an e-mail from someone whom I haven't spoken to in a very long time.
She told me I need to be saved.
She knows little more than my name, about me.
This pattern is suspiciously frequent.
Those same compelled to tell me to receive Jesus into my heart seem forever more compelled to disbelieve that he is already there.

Nintendo&Quantum Mechanics.

Super Mario explains The Multiverse.

旅行と花。[travel & flowers]

I am in Kanoya yet again for my business trip.
I will return Saturday night, by ferry, see some people I love, and set out once again on Monday; this time to Kumamoto for a meeting.
The day after that, I will journey to Beppu, Oita Prefecture, to substitute for one week. Even though I will lose valuable holidays, I will also get a chance to see the beauty that is Beppu, and I will be paid to go.
Hopefully work doesn't take up all of my time. I would love to do some Onsen hunting.

I've been listening to the vinyl of Radiohead's new album (albeit, online), and it is quite stirring. I wish I had a turntable, and that I could've somehow brought it to the hotel with me.
I still go shopping for vinyl from time to time, but every record I buy I give to my friend Hana, as he is part of a collaboration of DJ's in my town, Kokubu.
So far, I have given him "The Karate Kid OST", "Superman OST", and David Bowie's "Loving The Alien (Dub Remix, House Remix, Personal Remix)", all on vinyl.
Blasting "You're The Best" at 5am in Rastas (the bar which Hana works at) while doing shots, singing along, and getting weird looks from the last few remaining customers is certainly one of my high-points in Japan.
Hana and I are trying to plan a trip to his hometown, Nara, before I leave to spend some much needed time together, take in the sights, and hang out with his parents (in Japan, that means an unofficial drinking contest with us and his father).
Just thinking about it gets my hopes perhaps far too high. It's difficult for both of us to book holidays.
Even still, his is the most important friendship I have so far found in Japan--talking for four hours about philosophy the first time we hung out while not being able to speak the same language can hopefully give some idea as to why.
He knew I was in Kanoya tonight, but called to say hi.

Fucking wonderful.

New Layouts Feel Good.

Too many things to say, and I have neither enough time nor language to explain them.

Life feels good, I am discovering more of myself every day.
I have been contemplating much of my history here as of late.

I began to wonder, tonight, if those I know and have known would recognize me after a ten-minute conversation.

昨日の思考。[yesterday's thoughts]

I would like to write my way into
the sun-stained wind
& blow colour into the photographs
as I make them dance,
all tied together in a series of strings.
I move back and forth to hear
the sound of loosened strings
strumming.
I would move
the music into all our ears & fly
past your iris to watch
the colours swim
as the water floods in
& wish to send my sight back
to you,
to see what I do.